…what doesn't kill you makes you STRANGER.

Cross Words

Dear Summer (aka “Hustle Hopping”)

“…listen here summer baby…I just believe it’s the right thing to do. I got a brand new bitch Cooperate America…She showin’ me alot of action right now. I know you put me on my feet and all but, it’s time for me to grow…you gotta let me go baby…..so….I’m done for now/One! for now/possibly forever/we had fun together/like all good thing, we must come to an end…please show the same love to my friends…Dear Summer” Jay-Z “Dear Summer”.

I was just catching up with my homie Pigtails aka RissaCupcake of Magenta Speakers Blog (if you don’t read her shit you are a rih-tard). I was explaining to her that I’m no longer pursuing the same career that I once was, and in that explanation I kind of had this epiphany that maybe I didn’t really outgrow that “industry” as I had been telling myself lately, but actually I loved it too hard. Loved it too hard…not in a pornographic or psycho stalker kind of way, but more in the way of hugging a puppy until it dies. (You never hugged a puppy until it died? Me either. *R.I.P Fluffy*)

It doesn’t mean that I don’t love hip-hop, just not in that way. It’s like learning to be friends with an ex. You learn to live with not knowing what’s going on behind the scenes, at the same time you start seeing how cool of a chick she really is when the both of you aren’t chomping down on each others no-no parts. Yeah you miss the intimacy, but the distance is cool too.

The good thing is that what you learned from your last relationship, you can take into the new one. So while I didn’t achieve everything I set out to in my last endeavor, I will not make the same mistakes in my new hustle. I will admit however that my passion for this new venture isn’t as potent as it was for my previous uhhhh…venture (I know, my vocabulary bank needs some deposits. Forgive me, the last book I read was Twilight). I’m certain that my passion will grow with every ounce of work that I put in, so I’m not worried.

Jay-Z described Hip-Hop as the season of Summer. It’s the same for me, though for different reasons. Being involved with the music gave me freedom to express my creativity and put it out there for the world to judge. The process brought me really close to feeling that innocence of childhood…everything was new, exciting, disappointing and scary all at the same time.

So, I’m done for now…One for now…possibly forever, we had fun together…like all good things, we must come to and end…please show the same love to my friends…Dear Summer.


I got shot…with insulin.

When I was a kid I used to play a game with my homies. It didn’t make much sense but I guess it was fun. We would all take spoons and eat from a giant bucket of brown sugar while chanting “diabetes! diabetes! diabetes! diabetes!”. I’ve been diabetic for 10 years now, but I was hospitalized for the first time because of it last week. I thought about that dumb game we played as kids and I realized that I won.

Gonna make a change…word to Chris Brown dressed as Michael Jackson.

My Monday…and 6 other days. (aka “it was all good just a week ago”)

This post was started on 06/21/10 and completed on 06/27/10.

“Funy what 7 days can change…a stand up nigga, now you sit down to aim…used to have a firm grip now you droppin’ names…things was all good just a week ago” Jay-z ft Too Short “A week Ago”.

Greetings…It’s been a while I know. (still working on that procrastination thing). It’s Monday morning, I just watched North Korea take time from their Gucci Bag making schedules to get their asses handed to them by Portugal. I usually hate Mondays because it’s officially the end of my 2 days of avoiding human contact. Today however I’m optimistic. I don’t know why, I just am.

My weekend was weird. Only because I did two things I never do on weekends (one of those things I never do period). I baby sat 2 wonderfully fun children (more on that later…maybe not) and I went to work…ON SUNDAY!!!! The boss caught me on some Bill Lumberg shit…I couldn’t escape. However, I witnessed Juanita throw up…like projectile vomit…lol…classic Chopstix.  Now I’m heading back into work, with my desk chair still warm from yesterday. Oh well. I have the new issue of GQ (with that wolf kid from Twilight on the cover for the 600th time), and my new phone (MyTouch Slide 3g biatch!!!!!!). Both will keep my company as I “toil” (word to Mighty Sparrow- see previous post).

I was about to make an omelet for breakfast but I only have one egg and no bread. Hardly seems worth it at this point. Just remembered today is “dress down” at work. I swear it’s more difficult to dress down than it is to dress up. They use this “dress down” thing as an incentive and as a reward…GTFOH (get the fuck outta here). Today though I will treat the ladies and management alike to an ensemble I like to call “Sylvester Stallone Chic”. I’ll start it off with some Evisu Jeans (no knockoffs…the denim still has the finger prints of a 10 year old child laborer on them). Also some Nike 180’s. Then I top it off (pun intended) with a $5 gray sweatshirt from Walmart. Booyahhhh. Oh yeah…I want to thank my homie Lex for hooking me up with a few pairs of Evisus. Lex worked at a boutique and let me slide through (pause) to get fresh for the extra extra extra low. He is now one the most successful pop acts in the UK. Dope!

WTF????????? 6 days later!!!!!!!!!!

Ok…so remember that procrastination thing we talked about A WEEK AGO???? Well it’s a work in progress. I started this blog post last MONDAY…it’s now SUNDAY MORNING. In the hustle and bustle (wow…no red underline thingy on Bustle…I guess it’s a real word) of the work week, I failed to complete and post this shit. I promised myself to finish it and publish it by Monday night, and after some hardcore negotiating with myself, I settled on Tuesday morning. No luck there. I then came down with a case of the “fukkitz” (there’s that red underline thingy) and decided to finish it on Saturday, making it about my week rather than just Monday. After not sticking to that deadline, here we are….still…I give you my Week.

Monday- Went to work looking Fly…feeling even better. Broke my own personal sales record and was friendly to everyone including the temp. I avoided arguments with friends and pretty much maintained a positive attitude throughout the day. Ending it off with some DVR’d “Big Bang Theory” (thanks Mones) and World Cup highlights.

Tuesday- Woke up, no breakfast, no TV, still optimistic. No dress down for work today. I did pretty well as far as sales goes. Ummmmm (it’s a blur)…I think I made up with my homie Priscilla on Tuesday (We have a week long beef twice a year). Got advice from mom-dukes. Came home, DVR, sleep.

Wednesday- No freaking idea what happened, sales dwindled, can’t remember much more than that….oh yeah, had a meeting with my bosses about a project I’m working on…went well, and I did it without my novelty Clark Kent glasses. DVR, Sleep.

Thursday- See above (minus the meeting stuff).

Friday- OUT OF GAS, NO VACANCY, NO DOGS ALLOWED (word to Snoopy and/or Brian Griffin), NO SKATEBOARDING…I went in to work as a zombie. It was over before it started. I was basically 2 seconds from quitting every 5 seconds of the day, and what made it worse was everyone else was in a good mood (when I’m miserable I want company muhfukkas). I somehow managed to make it through the day (didn’t say it was profanity free). Once I got off, I jetted to my friend’s birthday dinner (barely avoiding an argument in the process). Pulled up to the restaurant…valet (one of my favorite pastimes)…meet and greet, good food, good laughs, salt water scent (or was it?), pretty girls (the birthday girl wore the crown in that contest though), had a really good time.  All in all it was a classy, quiet affair, I enjoyed it and I don’t think I made a fool of myself, even with my mild aspergers. I excused myself just as more pretty women arrived (I know, I’m an idiot). Valet tipped 5 bucks…jetted back to Quarter Deck to celebrate my homie Juanita’s B-day as well as Ponytail’s quitting. Wings, beer, laughs, pics etc…had a blast. Said my goodbyes and hit up my place of worship, WALMART. Got some cleaning supplies and diet ginger-ale. Got back to the cribo, maybe I watched some internet pr0n, maybe I didn’t.

Saturday- Saturday was so near-perfect that I’ll keep it to myself.

Sunday- Writing (blogs, marketing plan, etc).

Happy Birthday Vishal, Juanita, Streets.

Farewell Ponytail…the Pam Beasley to my Jim Halpert.

Thanks Dev for comin’ through to check a negro.

Thanks mom for being there through all these changes. (Stay tuned for a post about my mom).

Things were all good just a week ago…it doesn’t necessarily have to literally pertain to this post. It just means that things can change at any second and your life is changed forever. Like Drake said, “you never see it coming, you just get to see it go”.

Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars. Peace.

Welcome (better known as “Why do we Fall?”)

Nobody truly know me got me feeling so alone.They wonder what’s on my mind, what’s lingering in my dome I tell em’ ain’t nothing wrong, I deal with it on my own.I deal with it on my own. You’re all Welcome!….J-Cole “Welcome”.

Welcome to this…whatever this is. Eventually I will define what this is, or maybe you will. Right now though, let’s try to not be so formal. What I mean is, if you know me, then you probably already know why I’m doing this, or at least the events that led up to this. If you don’t know me then this probably sounds pretty close to a suicide note and for that I offer my apologies and a suggestion of “fear not”.

So I’m not going to bore you with the details of my life up to this point. However I do have this fear of leaving this place without anyone truly knowing who I am. What I mean is, up until this point I’ve kind of lived my life for others. Because of the pursuit of success and putting everyone else before myself, I’ve more or less let life pass me by. That doesn’t mean I’m a fucking bore either. I’ve picked up some interests along the way that I feel has set me apart from the “15 to 35 black male”…however I do like strippers and some good “coke rap” from time to time. So this is not going to be a blog about me sulking and being all “woe is me”. It’s more or less an opportunity for you (the unfortunate reader) and me (the strikingly handsome author…lol) to get to know ME for the first time in either of our lives.

“Why do we fall Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up” Thomas Wayne from the cornerstone of modern film, a movie called Batman Begins. OK, so I just quoted a line from a comic book movie that has helped me with my life recently….it sure beats “with great power comes great responsibility”. But I digress, back to the falling. I’ve fallen before, although not this far. Usually when I fall I tend to Peter Griffin the situation. I’ve decided to try a different approach this time around. I haven’t quite figured out what that different approach will entail, but I do know it will involve blogging (ha…I’m already doing that) and less procrastination (ha…I started writing this post 5 days ago…FAIL).

So feel free to walk with me on this journey…no, not that journey…more like this journey. Please wear comfortable shoes (preferably limited edition Nikes).

Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars. (and click the links, they’ll broaden the reader experience…no for real…don’t be an ass…click the links).